Day 80 - Merry Christmas!, originally uploaded by clarity25.

We have a very small Charlie Brown Christmas Tree this year.

He's cute, we named him "Herbert"

We had a fun Christmas Eve celebration last night filled with a lot of champagne and laughter. We slept in late today. The sun is shining, the weather is warm..

We're filled with hope for a new beginning and better times ahead.

Thank you to everyone that has helped us along the way, caring advice, encouraging words and your friendship.

It means more than you know.

I'm sincerely wishing you all a Very Merry Christmas!!

Lots of love,
Clarity

Day 79 - Flying back to San Francisco, originally uploaded by clarity25.

I'm sorry It's been a while since I've updated.

American Airlines sent me a FREE VOUCHER as a compensation for the problems I faced during my last flight with them.

I used the free voucher to book last minute plane tickets to visit my family in New York.

I've been in New York for the past week and a half.

This picture was taken during my flight back to San Francisco.

Now I'm back in California and I wish I could say things are going great.. but they're not.

I know in time, things will get better.

I uploaded pictures from the past 7 days.. you can click back to view them.

I can't believe Tomorrow is already Christmas Eve..

Day 78 - sadness.., originally uploaded by clarity25.

Percy (the family pug) can sense disharmony and tension in the household.

It's my last day here in New York with my family. I'm flying back to San Francisco tomorrow.

My father and I are fighting.

I wish it didn't have to be this way.

I'm going to miss my Mom and my sisters..

But it's time for me to go.

Day 77 - My family's christmas tree, originally uploaded by clarity25.

The Christmas tree is always put up in the same place each year.

Right next to the fireplace in the livingroom.

The tree brings back so many memories.. all the different ornaments from years ago. Memories of waking up at the crack of dawn and seeing the presents piled up underneath. My mother in her robe, my father with the video camera. The excitement.. the anticipation..

I wish I could spend Christmas with my family this year.

But it's not a possibility..

I wish my father would open his heart to Eric and accept him as a member of the family.

That's been my dream for the past 5 years. It hasn't happened yet.

Day 76 - Highschool musical 2 - the board game, originally uploaded by clarity25.

When you have a 13 year old sister.. you end up spending your evenings with games like this.

My 21 year old sister also joined in.

I've seen Highschool Musical more times than I'd care to admit. Believe it or not, I know all about Ashley Tisdale, Corbin Blue and Zac Effron now.

Do you?

Well.. Regardless..Amber still beat me.

Day 75 - Amber's 13th birthday, originally uploaded by clarity25.

My youngest sister, Amber turned 13 today.

It's hard to believe she's already a teenager, I still see her as a little 4 year old...

But she's almost as tall as me now.

She chats on her cellphone with her friends, dresses like a cool teen, rolls her eyes when I try to talk to her like a child and loves Nick Jonas from "The Jonas Brothers"

I'm glad I could be here for her 13th birthday, This is a big one for her..

That's my father's hand on the left with the lighter, My mother with the candle and me reaching out on the bottom left.

Day 72 - Snow day in New York, originally uploaded by clarity25.

I flew home to New York 4 days ago using my airline voucher.

Today it snowed...

The weather is so much colder than San Francisco, I'm glad I left my winter Jacket here.

It's good seeing my family again.

Day 63 - HOLLYWOOD, originally uploaded by clarity25.

We're in Hollywood!

Sorry for being missing in action lately. So much has been happening lately and I haven't had a chance to come online to post pics to document it all.

You're probably wondering what on earth I'm doing in Hollywood. here's a brief recap of what has happened over the past week and a half :

Things became very difficult, overwhelming and tense around Thanksgiving time. it's a complex situation. I was also very worried because my little sister has to undergo surgery soon.

Then I was working non-stop on my portfolio for a Concept Art training seminar in Hollywood, Los Angeles.

Michael nearly jumped out the bedroom window. It would have been a five story fall.. and it's terrifying to wake up to the sight of your cat dangling out of the window. (see Day 57)

Next thing I knew, we were throwing our suitcases into the back of John's car and all driving to L.A. We've been attending lectures, seminars and job training on concept art and development from 10 A.M. to 7 P.M. on a soundstage in a television studio. I've learned so much, met a lot of fascinating people and made great connections.

I'm typing this from a laptop in a hotel room in Hollywood.

This is my first time here in Hollywood and it's crazy exciting for me. I'm seeing everything that I only knew from the movies..it's all very surreal actually. I can't believe I'm here!

We're driving back to San Francisco tomorrow afternoon.

I feel like I'm one step closer to reaching our dream, this has been such an incredible experience.

I'll write more when I return, I'm running out of hotel internet minutes. I just posted some of the previous pictures taken during this week that I didn't get a chance to upload until right now. You can click back to view them.

Also here's some video footage taken from inside Miceli's Oldest Pizzeria in Hollywood. The owner walked up to the piano and just started singing. I caught it on film. The atmosphere was amazing.. thought i'd share a brief clip.

youtube.com/watch?v=auODZdUE9Gk

Day 63 of 365 days

Day 62 - Hotel California, originally uploaded by clarity25.

Our hotel room in Hollywood has sliding glass doors that lead to a private balcony area. I woke up and stepped outside in my pajamas.

Even though I didn't bring my bathingsuit and it's too chilly to swim.. it was nice to gaze down at the pool and lounge on the patio chairs on the balcony with a cup of coffee.

Our schedule is packed.. so we only have about 15 minutes to eat breakfast, but at that moment.. It felt like a vacation..

Day 62 of 365 days

Day 61 - Just one of the guys..., originally uploaded by clarity25.

7 girls, 120 men... I'm a minority here at the workshop

The Concept Art field is dominated by men. Particularly in the film and videogame department.

It's a little intimidating. The instructors in this program I'm attending are all men except for ONE woman. They make sexist jokes about drawing woman's breasts bouncing, nipples and trying to sneak in nudity. The guys were roaring with laughter and clapping their hands.

All I can do is shake my head slightly with a smile and roll my eyes.

As a girl, you're looked at differently. It's as though they expect you to pull out a portfolio with stick figures, rainbows and badly drawn Unicorns. You have to work twice as hard to overcome the stereotypes.

They seem surpised that a girl can draw at all.

but I'm enjoying the challenge

I'll prove them wrong and pave the way for more female artists in a male dominated field...

I hope.

Day 61 of 365 days

Day 60 - Inside the Television Studios, originally uploaded by clarity25.

This training seminar is being held in a television studio. To get in, we need to show our badge when the gates slide open. We're in Stage 14, it's a sound stage with blue screens. (or rather GREEN)

During the lunch break they serve sandwiches and pizza, you can wander around the lot.. It's just like you see in the movies. The various stages, the people in golf carts, people with cell phones, lots of ladders.. different levels.

It's just like I imagined behind the scenes hollywood. I just wish we had more time to explore the city during the day. I don't think I'll be seeing the beach, beverly hills or sunset boulevard during our trip. The schedule is too packed.

Day 59 - Boulevard of Stars, originally uploaded by clarity25.

We had to see the famous Hollywood Chinese theater during our trip and check out the stars handprints, signatures and footprints in the cement. It was drizzling, damp and cold.. but I didn't want to miss it.

That girl with her hand in George Clooney's handprint is not me. I'm the shadow on the top left wandering off to see Johnny Depp's handprint.

I'm not a big George Clooney fan.

Afterwards we went to Miceli's.

see here for video footage

youtube.com/watch?v=auODZdUE9Gk

Day 58 - Arrival, originally uploaded by clarity25.

We're in Hollywood!!

It was a long seven hour drive from San Francisco.

John and Celine are staying in one room, We're down the hall in another room.

we're excited... but exhausted.

I can't wait for tomorrow!

Day 58 of 365 days

Day 57 - We almost lost Michael, originally uploaded by clarity25.

We almost lost Michael today.

We live on the top floor of a 5 story building. Our bedroom windows are big and don't have any screens.

We usually keep them closed, but last night we were so hot, that we opened one of the windows. We meant to close it before falling asleep, but we passed out from exhaustion.

We woke up to our roommate Celine saying in a strained voice. "Pssst! Wake up! Michael is out the window!!"

I blinked open my eyes in confusion, I gazed around and then I saw what she was referring to.

Michael was hanging out of the window. Half of his body inside, his paws clutched the window sill. His bottom part hanging out.

One wrong move and he would lose balance. He would fall down 5 stories to his death.

I was afraid to breathe. I knew that If I moved towards him too quickly it would startle him. He was tottering back and forth. Half in.. half out..He was slipping. Any fast movement would send him over the edge.

Eric very slowly approached him. then he stuck his hand out the window.. gripped michael's back end and eased him back inside. Michael regained balance and was safe. (albeit a bit shaken up and trembling)

We quickly shut the window.

we never thought that would happen. It was a frightening moment. What possessed him to try to jump out the window in the first place?

We almost lost Michael.

The entire day I was filled with relief.

Has anyone else had a moment where their pet came close to tragedy? narrowly missing being hit by a car or some other potential catastrophe?