Day 185 - Confession, originally uploaded by clarity25.

There are some defining moment in life. Moments that terrify you and all you have is your faith and hope. You are helpless.

Moments when you realize how petty problems like Financial struggles, moving decisions, job choices and small every day dramas are... It doesn't matter in light of the larger issues that you can't control and that change your life.

I don't want to write in details what is happening today in this public blog. My close friends know and you know which locked diary to go to for more information.. It's very private but the future fate of my younger brother's life is on the line. It all lies on the decision of one man.

In a few hours I will be entering a court room with my family.

This is something that has been going on for 6 long years. It's a heavy storm cloud that has been overshadowing everything and hasn't gone away. I can't begin to describe the struggles we've gone through and the tears we've cried over this. It's something that no family wants to go through. You read about things like this in the Newspapers and think "Oh that wont happen to someone I love."

But it does happen.

Today could mark the end of a lot of pain or start another 8 months of pain for my entire family.

I've been acting calm on the outside, confident that all will go well and acting like a pillar of strength. But the truth is that I'm scared and it's hard to confess that without appearing weak. I need to be the strong one, that's my role in the family. Someone has to keep their cool.

I'm so scared right now for my younger brother... I couldn't even sleep last night.