Sorry for being M.I.A. and then returning with the worst picture ever.
I don't have much time at the moment to produce a better photo (I'm writing this from a friend's computer) but I wanted to display a sign of life.
As you probably guessed. My laptop officially kicked the bucket and I couldn't afford a new one.
GOOD NEWS:... I just received a laptop from a friend which doesn't work either, BUT it only needs a small inexpensive part to get it running again. So hopefully I'll be back in action very soon.
I would love to say that my life has been grand lately, but unfortunately things have been really rough for me.
Family dramas, (I'm currently estranged from my father and we no longer talk) Fights, Financial troubles, I've been sick, and my mother's having a surgery soon. To be honest, I haven't even had the urge to document my life anymore because it's not a pretty picture to display to the world. It's become depressing. I know everyone has problems and I realize that opening up about it will make others feel less alone. It's just really hard sometimes. We were so much happier in Europe but now.... I just didn't imagine things would end up like this. Sometimes I truly regret my decision to move back to the United States.
I've cried so much in the past 4 weeks.
I feel like I should have sad violin music accompanying this text.
Anyhow, as sappy as this sounds... I've really missed you guys and Diaryland. Thank you for all your caring and concerned notes.It meant a lot to me. If you sent me an E-mail , please don't be upset if I can't write back right away. At the moment, it's difficult to access the internet at all and I have 235 messages in my INBOX. (50% of it SPAM I'm sure). I haven't even checked MYSPACE yet.
I'll be back online soon though with my new working laptop. *fingers crossed* I look forward to catching up on all the blogs I've missed. I haven't touched my camera in a long time, I've really been in a funk
But I just wanted you to know that I'm okay.
Sincerely,
Clarity
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A sign of life!!! YAY!!!
Clarity, I know you're going through a difficult time right now (And having computer problems on top of that) but when you get your new laptop working, I really hope you'll start taking pictures again and documenting your life.
It *will* make you feel better and we miss you. Things will get better!
P.S. I'm really sorry about what's going on with your Dad. I mean no disrespect but he's being HORRIBLE. I heard about it from Dawn. I tried to call you last week but you didn't pick up. I was worried. I'm glad you're okay.
-S
At Tuesday, April 17, 2007, 
The Queen
Welcome back, Clarity. I'm glad to see that you are still alive and kicking. I've missed you. xoxo - me
I'm sorry things are so gloomy there but have to say that I'm really glad to see that you're alive and kicking!!
I've been worried and have missed the snippets of your world you share with us.
Sending you good vibes and better thoughts,
Nix
Hi Clarity,
Am sorry things have been bad for you recently but am so pleased you're still out there somewhere. I've got my fingers crossed that things smooth out for you soon and don't forget that when you hit the bottom the only way you can go is up!! Take care, love Vicola x
At Wednesday, April 18, 2007, Kathleen
Thank you for posting, Clarity. I was getting very worried, even though I knew there were definitely computer problems. I have a POS desktop you can have. It works, just vvvveeeerrrrryyyyyy slowly. Yours if you want it. Although I can't imagine why anybody would. ;-) Except to take a sledgehammer to in order to vent. Love you, chica.
So glad to hear from you...I have really missed your posts and pictures so much. Hope to heard from you now more regularly.
Take it easy...sending positive thoughts & vibes your way...
~smooches~
Thank you so much for letting us know you are ok!! I was worried about you, knowing how things were going with your dad in your last post. I miss your pictures and writing so I look forward to you coming back soon:) I hope things get better with your dad:(
Thank you for checking in and letting us know you're okay. :) I'm relieved. Sorry things have been so rough though. Keep hanging in there...
It's made my day knowing you're OK! Thanks for the update. That sucks things are so crappy right now, they will get better. AND - Happy Anniversary to you and Eric!!! May your 6th year be as amazing as the first 5, Clarity. -Acorn
At Friday, April 20, 2007, Tamossa
Well when you come back and things are working for you. I want to add you to my MySpace. www.myspace.com/tgis_me Unless you get to me first. Guessing you'll have to, since I don't know the URL to yours. I bet we all wish we could do something for you to make you more comfortable and to ease your troubles away. Hang in there tho! We'll all here be when you get back. xoxoxox
Tams
Yay! I'm so glad to know you're okay :) Hope to hear more from you soon!!! Best wishes, so things can turn around soon!
Cheese and Rice!
I just jumped in my seat a little!
Happy to see a sign of life!
It sucks that your dad has decided to go that route, hopefully he realises that it's not a war he will win.
Thought of you on my trip this past weekend, ALL YOU CAN EAT SUSHI! BEER! and ART! I think you and Eric would really love Montreal.
Oh and I think about 38 of those emails are probably from me, okay maybe not that many but a few!
Stay good!
At Friday, April 27, 2007, Unknown
Glad to see you're okay.
I hope you patch things up with your Dad, hun. My hubby's Dad just passed away this last week, and he regrets the years when he and his Dad weren't speaking to each other.
I'd just hate for something to happen to your Dad and y'all not on speaking terms...especially after how excited you were for him to be back home from the Service. :(
Hope you find some sunshine in your life real soon!
