Last night I dreamt that we were back in Germany. We were walking down the cobblestone streets together to work, meeting up with our friends at "the Cafe Wunderbar", hearing the churchbells and weaving through the narrow alleyways. The ancient churches, the river running through the small town, the old buildings...
I blinked awake and saw the now familiar view of pristine 2 story homes of American Suburbia. All the homes on our street are new and were built within the past 8 years. I saw the next door neighbor step into his SUV with his business suit and pull out of the driveway.
it's so different here...
I miss Europe so much. Sometimes It feels like a dull ache in my stomach.
We don't have our new car on the road yet. The previous owner lost her title to the car, she claimed it wouldn't be an issue but and the DMV wouldn't accept only the registration last week. So we have to buy her a new title and she has to fill out all these new forms. Meanwhile the car just sits unused without plates while we wait.
It's frustrating, starting over and the struggles we keep encountering to get completely back on our feet since returning to the states. sometimes I just want to take the next plane back...When is it going to get easier?
This morning as I sipped my coffee, I glanced down at the text in the mug. A mug we brought with us from Germany.
"Aller Anfang ist Schwer"
Translation: "Every Beginning is hard."
Day 105 of 365 days
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At Wednesday, January 24, 2007, 
River Man
Great mug! I'm jealous. There's nothing quite like those convenient moments in life when you see/hear/find something you really need at just the right time. If I was a deeper man, I'd say it was fate. =) Harder starts make ya appreciate the middle more.
At Wednesday, January 24, 2007, candoor
you have each other and I've got to believe that two people as talented as you two just have to stay positive and keep at your art... maybe you were meant to be bi-country (as opposed to bi-coastal :)
At Thursday, January 25, 2007, 
David and I are starting to explore our possible transition to the states (the dreaded green card process!). On one hand, I am excited to be near friends and family again. But on the other, I know I will miss it here, despite the crappy commute into work and the weather.
Reading your words makes me appreciate the remaining time I have here and not just focus on the potential future.
At Thursday, January 25, 2007,
Thanks, Clarity, for this phrase today. I am at the beginning of a new part of my life, too, and am scared sh**less! I want to do it but I don't. I know it is going to be so life changing and so SELF changing. Like you, I wonder if it is for the best, and sometimes fear it can change who I am for the worst. It's going to be very difficult, and I guess you just have to keep in mind that every new beginning IS hard.
At Wednesday, January 31, 2007,
You will make it, I have faith. Keep at it, day by day. In a few months, you'll be able to look back with awe!
